a Hello, and a bit of Why?
This is the first of many articles I’ve been wishing to write for years…Writing is a scary thing to do, and I can anticipate I’ll think of every reason not to, so I decided to make the first today, on this Friday in sunny San Francisco, and in the company of good music, the first real stake.. an explanation to myself of why I’m writing.
*Future fede please read this repeatedly, indefinitely.*
- In short, I feel like I’ve symbolically been in the crowd-side most of my life; Just looking, learning, scrolling, questioning, observing, taking, stealing, copying, criticizing (continue inserting any term that ‘takes’ here endlessly.) I understand this is the nature of who we are (right?) As they say, “To learn and see, before we do.” But I just feel like I’ve taken too much, for too long, and I haven’t been reciprocal enough.
I realized I want to take the time, (and actually make the time) to contribute and give back. To try and formally attempt to represent this altruism I’m always so dreamy and voyeuristic about in whatever way I can. After all, its been those beings who have done this with me (and really with all of us), at just the right times, who I attribute the most important life lessons, memories and reflections in my life. These moments, words, and feelings are the ones I hold closest to the heart. I carry them with me. They remind me of what’s good, and they give me the breath and might to keep me going.
More Why’s :
2. Because writing is a practice I’ve always valued and enjoyed in it’s honesty. It’s so incredibly intimate. Like both a whisper and a scream. It’s captivating and revealing.
3. Because I want to put my stories and my mind on paper. Stories and thoughts I have developed through my life, my creative process, and my fortune of working in respected design studios, designing across multiple continents, and having the cosmic chance of meeting incredibly thoughtful design leaders (to me, philosophers). I’ve grown fearful of these stories and ideas being lost and never culminating in anything if I pass (I really really really care about them.)
4. Because I want to inspire you. Its kind of crazy but the only constant I realized exists among all the people who have inspired me the most across all fields, is all of them wrote. My love for my passions related to culture, travel, ethics, and technology, have always for better or worse benefitted immensely from written thoughts, explorations and even sometimes irrelevant beliefs. These writers, or anthropologists (as I like to think of them) have always given me hope, and freed me in my many times of doubt. I’d love to someday be this for someone, and I’m willing to try.
Words persist, they define, they mark, they endure.
5. Because I simply love and believe in what I do, but I had a lot of doubts. Like a whole fuck-ton of them. I belong to an emerging field (UX) I literally had no idea existed. I’m in love with one I feel has the key, but has not been documented enough (Systems thinking)… and I studied a field I didn’t even know what it meant, or even was, when I started school (Service Design). If you want to add more doubts in life… I’m an immigrant, from a developing country, who grew up in South Florida, double majored out of pure passion with a lot of student loans, and lived an adolescent life through one of the worst US recessions in modern history, all while going to three different high schools. If you assimilate to any of this in any way shape or form, man do I look up to you. You are my real heroes. I really appreciate how fucking tough you are, and I know what it feels like, it’s fucking hard. But I believe in you, I believe in us. I want to be a resource of help for all of you who relate to this. Every step keeps moving us up.
To put it simply, I want to try and be the resource I wish I would’ve had.
6. Because this year I had the pleasure of becoming a teacher, but I have found myself repeating similar things to my students and friends, so this is also an effort to collect all my thoughts and experiences being a designer in one place. One where everyone can have access to both my advice and personal perspective.
7. Because after much reflection, writing is part of the mark I’d love to leave behind. For anyone who ever thinks of their stories as insecurities (or as a limitation), I want to remind you that those “but’s, and what if’s” will always exist, but that with love, hard work, good energy, and a good tribe, that everything can be possible. I’m here to constantly root for you.
Here’s to you underdogs. Keep going… keep working. I promise you’ll get there, and to share how doing just that worked for me.
8. Because I’ve grown to care deeply for the future. We are going through a tumultuous time in the world, and instead of just saying and criticizing what I’m against, I want to start carving out my own piece of the internet and put all my love and energy into those ideas of which I am for.
9. Because I live far from those I love, because my best friends are scattered all over the world, and I don’t quite know what home “home” is anymore. This is an attempt to share more of me with those of you, in longer more exploratory formats, about what I do, what I’ve done, what I’m doing, and what’s on my mind.
10. Finally, I promised my grandparents I would, and I want them to know before anything happens: that I’ve started. Y que también escribiré en español por ellos, y por que se el valor y la energía que le falta a nuestro equipo latino.
I need this meditation, and this reflection. I want to open this dialogue, and I want to hear from you as much as you hear from me.
I want my next learnings to start here.
With love siempre,
Fede
